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HeliTorque Forum Index » Anything Goes!

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Chuckle Chuckle
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heliaviator
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Joined: Jan 28, 2005
Posts: 388
Location: ESSEX 51deg 47,04N 0deg 9,47E


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 30, 2005 7:07 am    Post subject: Chuckle Chuckle Reply with quote

Found this on a webite and had a good chuckle Very Happy

SQUAWKS are problems noted by USAF pilots and are left for maintenance crews to fix before the next flight.
Here are some actual complaints logged by pilots and the replies from the maintenance crews.

1. Test flight okay, except auto-land very rough
Auto land not installed on this aircraft
2. DME volume unbelievably loud
Volume set to more believable level
3. Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick
That's what they're there for
4. Number three engine missing
Engine found on right wing after brief search
5. Target Radar hums
Reprogrammed Target Radar with the words
6. Aircraft handles funny
Aircraft warned to straighten up and be serious
7. Left inside main tyre almost needs replacement
Almost replaced left inside main tyre
8. Evidence of leak on right main landing gear
Evidence removed
9. IFF inoperative
IFF always inoperative in OFF mode
10. Something loose in cockpit
Something tightened in cockpit
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heliaviator(Ian) PPL(H) R44
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