Posted: Tue Feb 03, 2009 11:16 pm Post subject: Winter Ops
Todays Good advice
Live in a county that doesn't do snow !
Run out of heating oil on the morning that the county decides it doesn't do snow, because your heating oil supplier can't be arse to answer the phone and when they do they give you and estimated delivery date of 3 weeks hence.
Go out to 'obtain' some aviation quality heating oil that morning, in a Peugeot with a knackered clutch.
Spend 15 minutes tying to get more than 100yds from your house in the Peugeot.
During that fifteen minute period contemplate continuing with your mission while you create a frozen road surface with your now almost slick tyres (confirmed by burning rubber smell).
Spend another half an hour driving to a location 3 miles away that no one else has been stupid enough to try and drive to that day.
Open the door to the 'Heating Oil' supply to discover that the last muppet who used it had no idea of the concept of Off when it related to fuel drains.
Spend half an hour trying to muck out the floor of the now contaminated heating oil supply which is covered in smelly flammable fluid.
Decant just enough 'Heating Oil' to make the front of your car very light and reverse the route with a complete lack of steering.
Spend 15 minutes going 200 yards because you understand the concept of
The sign in front of you naming the village where you live that would look odd with a Peugeot shaped hole in it.
The ABS fault warning you now have warning you of your impending doom.
The icy surface you created leaving the village an hour earlier.
Spend 15 seconds of terror as you slide down the hill towards your house where all the local kids are playing snowballs in the street, steering and brakes at this point pretty qualify as 'Installed' only.
Spend an hour trying to put 90 litres of 'Aviation Quality' heating oil into the empty tank outside your house, which is covered in snow. [Involves a ladder which ALWAYS a bad move in snow].
Spend a further hour 'engineering' the boiler which now only understands the concept of fresh air which does not traditionally burn on its own.
Spend another hour redoing the earlier route to return Jerry Cans and refill two of them, one of which now has a dodgy lid seal.
Return to the now slight better approach to the village and brake gently to avoid the 4x4 thats coming up the hill.
Realise that the metallic bang you just heard was the result of the previously mentioned Jerry Can with the dodgy lid falling over.
Hope the lid remains intact, the sound of gushing liquid indicates it didn;t, so hoping was futile.
Spend another hour trying to rid the car of the the esitmated 10 litres of 'Aviation Quality' heating oil that is now under the back seat.
Decide that using the diesel driven pump is a bad idea due to the quantity of fluid and vapour in the afrorementioned supply (shed).
Use your handbrake as a steering aid.
Abandon the car in the road into the village and carry the fuel cans the rest of the way, because you need thr exercise.
And some people think the glass is half full !
I obviously have no idea who this happened to and am just passing on the good advice !
Posted: Wed Feb 04, 2009 12:06 am Post subject: Aviation Quality Heating Oil...
Its a damn shame 'they' don't live in the midlands, I reckon where I'm working, we dispose of maybe a few thousand litres of premium quality aviation heating oil every few weeks!!
The test department runs the stuff in closed loop rigs, it apparently degrades to the point where it needs to be replaced, at one point last yr one of the tests I was working was getting through maybe 2-300Litres a day! I'm damn sure it'd have been ok in a burner.
As far as I know my client pays for someone to take it away and recycle it, problem is we mix water and all manner of other liquids in with it so it no doubt reduces its value somewhat.
You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum